UCW Wrestling's Isaiah "Ice" Burg Publicly Threatens Me & Pedro Espada Talks Gut Punching

     That's a photo of a hapless Isaiah "Ice" Burg on the receiving end of seemingly endless punishment during Underground Championship Wrestling (UCW) match #337, a match I've already reviewed. Originally, the blog entry bore the title, "UCW's Michael Hannigan: Not A 'Paper Champion'" and it was intended as recognition of the often under-appreciated talents of the former champ ("Ringside At Skull Island" blogger Joe immediately comes to mind -- how anyone could praise a cheap-shot artist like Eli Black and malign a skilled athlete like Hannigan is beyond me).
     As for Michael's opponent, Isaiah "Ice" Burg -- he was essentially irrelevant to the story. I felt neither fondness nor animosity toward Isaiah. I politely noted the wrestling skills that he'd displayed during his earlier match against Ethan Axel Andrews. The fact that Michael Hannigan absolutely and totally dominated Isaiah during match #337 was presented as testimony to Michael's incredible skill, not to any ineptitude on Isaiah's part.

     Make no mistake about it -- match #337 was one of the rarest phenomenon in pro wrestling. This was a unique example of a "face" squashing a "heel." It's not often that a brutally aggressive villain plays the role of jobber, but it happened here.

     From day one, "Ice" (a nickname seemingly chosen to denote ice water in the veins, a cold-blooded nature, a cold heart -- flattery in the mind of this particular wrestler) made no pretense at sportsmanship or even common, human decency. During his initial "Inside Scoop" appearance, "Ice" saw fit to joke about killing potential UCW opponents. Ethan Axel Andrews (who was conducting the interview) made some regrettable quip about there being no rules in UCW except a prohibition on murder. "Ice" then devised a loophole -- injuring UCW competitors so badly that they died in the hospital days later.

     Michael Hannigan (who, along with Ethan Axel Andrews, is one of only two "legitimate" All Star Champions in UCW history) was obviously unintimidated by "Ice's" bluster. Throughout match #337, Michael racks up pinfall after pinfall, submission after submission from "Ice," who seems to be experiencing a humiliating meltdown.

     What makes this defeat of "Ice" by Hannigan so devastatingly thorough is the fact that the referee for this title match, Quinn Harper, harbored a grudge against the former champion. Harper's officiating during match #337 is blatantly, unapologetically biased against Michael. Time and time again, Harper refuses to count when "Ice's" shoulders are pinned, refuses to acknowledge "Ice's" attempts to tap out.

     Hannigan literally walks all over "Ice" during match #337. "Ice" frequently resembles a doormat, and any "killer instincts" that this once-feared grappler possesses are probably turned inward by the time the bout concludes.

     Out of empathy for "Ice" after viewing this emotionally crippling (for him) beatdown, I didn't really go into detail about the multitudinous indignities he suffered during match #337. Clearly, "Ice" was outclassed by a far superior technical wrestler in Michael Hannigan, but I saw no point in rubbing salt in "Ice's" wounds.

     Yes, I tried to be diplomatic...until I saw the most recent "Inside Scoop" video at UCW's website. Incredibly, there is "Ice" Burg calling me out by name, cursing me, and threatening me in terms generally uttered by homicidal psychopaths. Why? Well, in my previous review of match #337, I simply mentioned that "Ice" was "able to mount virtually no offense" in that encounter.

     That was all I said during my review of one of the most one-sided mismatches in the history of modern sports. A mild observation like that caused "Ice" to go ballistic? I never knew that the dear boy was so sensitive.

     In direct response to "Ice's" videotaped tirade, let me say the following. In no way will you EVER prevent me from exercising my first amendment rights, at this or any other forum. Your challenge to fight me in a UCW match is ludicrous (Google it -- it's not a misspelled reference to the rapper). You probably are impressed by rhyming rhetoric so...I'm a writer, not a fighter. A fitting analogy would be me challenging you to create your own blog and gain a larger audience than mine. (It's actually unlikely that you could even remember your intended topic throughout the course of composing a single paragraph. As the blurb at the end of your pathetic display of mic skills suggested, you wrestled former UCW Champion Michael Hannigan -- not current UCW Champion Eli Black. Poor thing, I know it gets confusing.)

     Moving right along...on a strangely related note, UCW wrestler Pedro Espada visited me at my Connecticut home yesterday. Despite audio problems, I managed to salvage this fascinating footage during which Pedro discusses his membership in "the gut punching community" and tells us how this proclivity has played into his matches against Michael Hannigan and Ethan Axel Andrews. Pedro mentions experiences during his middle school  and high school years in East Hartford, CT during which his ability to take a punch was constantly being tested (East Hartford is a different world from many other parts of the state). Pedro acknowledges that he never had clearly defined abs "like Private Jack Marino or Hiro" (sorry, Eli). During his early adolescence, Pedro didn't really have a name for his gut-punching fetish, but he always considered the abs to be "the most attractive body part on a man." Pedro's friends were always trying to catch him off-guard with a gut punch, but he literally can count the number of times they were successful. Pedro has successfully withstood gut punching from a pro boxer and a two-on-one confrontation. Part of the appeal for Pedro is the challenge, but there's an added dimension that he can't explain. Here -- listen for yourself (and once again, sorry about the audio quality).

     I really wanted to have FAITH (remind me to discuss Pedro's shoulder tat at a later date) that Pedro was one of the good guys in UCW. However, after our taped interview concluded and we were chatting informally, Pedro admitted that he is being groomed as one of the federation's "heels." Pedro also mentioned that UCW founder Michael "Bodyslam" had been aware of our scheduled meeting -- a complete surprise to me, since Bodyslam had been playing coy about this matter during Facebook messages we'd exchanged. Bodyslam is, of course, mainly responsible for the anarchic, no-rules approach in UCW. Now he most certainly knows my home address via online interaction with Pedro. On top of all that, Bodyslam posted a sinister reminder to me via Facebook just this morning: "Pedro isn't that nice in the ring. He did tie up UCW Michael Hannigan and take some cheap shots at him." Yes, that's true...
     However, what really troubles me is the fact that Pedro unexpectedly brought up "Ice's" name -- he said that they were part of a UCW alliance and a friendship in real life. I didn't think much of it at the time. Then, a few hours later, that threatening "Inside Scoop" was posted.
     Ah, well...it's my problem. I won't trouble you with it. I know you come here for discussions about UCW wrestling, and I intend to keep right on blogging.
     Oh, by the way, the "Ice" vs. Hannigan match (#337) is available for purchase at the UCW website. Buy it and have fun counting the number of minutes (maybe seconds) that "Ice" is displaying any offensive skills whatsoever.